The story of JiJi and Pizza

some things i never told u...
during my 21st birthday, when we were gonna sleep, somebody called my hp, remember?

- it was a guy who supported me in everything i do since jc and listened to my problems and always helped me. we studied for A levels together, however i treated him purely like a friend. through JC until his army and my first year in uni before i met you, he always chatted with me, even though he was overseas for army training, he always came back with presents. he trained himself really hard, jogged everyday, just because somebody else told him clues that i liked guys who are fit.

it always get stressful when a friend you really trusts start to expect something else from you. i told you when we first met. it became almost as though the friendship were all fake and plotted, if a good guy friend suddenly pops the question. i always preferred that they just see/treat me as a guy.

i didn't develop special feelings for guys, not until i met u. and i distant myself from all the guy friends, and never believed in platonic friendships.

he called to wish me happy 21st. he was worried i couldn't handle the party and needed help. he wanted to give me a present. he wanted to come for my party and wish me - but i never invited him. for your sake. i chose you and never swayed.

he knew i had u. i turned him down. i said sorry. i love my bf alot alot and he was too late. tt's how i broke someone's heart. at some point i did mention about this to you before. u also said, that u love me very very much, just that u didn't say it. i remember it very clearly. too clear it was as though yesterday.

from then on, i blocked him on msn. i lost the best friend i ever had. i knew we couldn't be friends after he popped the question. i don't want to hurt him further or let anything happen to hurt the relationship between me and u.

now that i installed the new msn, the block list feature is gone. i saw him online, but i never confided in him. never.

it is because i genuinely love you from the bottom of my heart. to stay committed to you.

hold on to our happiness, time is short. not hold on to anger...

posted by pizzza @ 4:17 PM